drip, Drip.

Gently; gently, dear.

I want to inhabit your dreams.
To infect your mind with thoughts so vivid
they seep into your subconscious
and surface in symptoms unwonted.
Then waking, I desire to be your Addiction,
your dilated pupils, focusing on
one thing and One alone.
I want your affection,
your attention, and admiration.
Your jealousy, your passion, your anger.
I want your being,
I want it all.
My desire is for you to be lost in my world,
confused and dizzy, terrified and stunned,
engulfed and enraptured.
Forget your own world, come join in
My own. I want your hopes,
your aspirations, I want you
To dream of nothing else.
Then in being in me (lost in the world
I have created),
You and I will become One,
We, Us.
And no longer will we speak of
anything else, because there will be
Nothing.
Nothing of You and I,
Nothing else,
us.

I want you to feel what I do. I want you to understand.

I’m not going to lie. This photo was taken and edited earlier this month when Resolution was taken and edited. I’ve tried taking pictures twice this week, neither time resulting in anything I’d consider post-worthy. I’ve been really swamped with things to do between work, school, and a social life, which is good, but if you combine it with these horrid Canadian winters, you end up with a pretty exhausted person.

Heres to hoping next week I’ll be a little less tired.

I think I’ll pace my apartment a few times
And fall asleep on the couch
Wake up early to black and white re-runs
That escape from my mouth

All I wanted was you…

Lyrics: All I Wanted – Paramore

Lock yourself up in your convent,
Close your eyes to the world outside.
You don’t need to know.
Live your life between four walls.

There’s no need for knowledge over and above
the knowledge that you need to live,
to breathe, to eat, to drink, to sleep.
Live your life in the shadows,
Hide your face in the cellar.

Glimpse into the world from your window
when you are underwhelmed.Try to understand
the every day occurrences.
Your innocence, your child-like naivety,
grants you permission to judge. You
interpret. Think you know. You
know no better.

Who told you it was right to go on this way?
Pretending your wrongs are better than others’?
You hold innocence before your face,
Using it as an excuse never to know,
Never finding a need to try.

I want to rip it from your face, your mask.
Tear it to a thousand pieces
so that you can never glue it back together.
Then you will understand the outside world.
Then you will know.
Then, hopefully, you will finally cease your judgment.

I resolve
to be more autonomous;
to understand the social conditioning I have undergone,
and do what is in my power to prevent it from controlling all aspects of my life and thought.
I must find my own half-way line between the self restraint society forces me to impose on myself,
and the self expression I desperately wish to perfect;
after I find this half-way line, I must balance my weight upon it.

I resolve to think,
to analyze myself and others,
as I have and always will;
I will try to leave just enough time for thinking,
not too little lest I find myself giddy with an empty head,
and not too much lest my thoughts weigh me down.
I have struggled with the latter frequently in past,
so I must tread carefully.

Most importantly, though,
I resolve
to grow; to expand my learning in all that I can
and to not be afraid,
lest I hold myself back unnecessarily.

These are my resolutions.